FREAKING OUT

So its October... about 4 months ago, i sat with my Dean and nodded my head when he said "Go for Phd asap!". Oh dear, 4 months.. and still no action on my part. My contract would end in early january.. that means i have to find a place to study sooooon....

What i have accomplished in the past 4 months (a slow crawl to securing a spot in Melbourne!) is published 2 articles... it feels like that's all i've been doing..tons n tons of paper writing.. but only 2 were accepted. sigh.. xpe.. usaha tangga kejayaan.. so i'm not taking this as a bad sign but more like fluency training..the more you practice the more you can write fast and finish an article within a few days rather than weeks.

As I am currently working on my 3rd paper to publish, I realized that I need a research topic for my phd. What to do? What to research? Somehow talking to many people didnt help me solve the serabutness in my head.. they all added to the jumble-mumble... I'm torn.. should I do a research about anxiety in adolescents or obesity in adolescents?

The pros for doing obesity is that I can collect my data here in Hospital Putrajaya.. seems like they have this obesity clinic.. bad news is.. our people arent obese because their depress, their obese because they just love to eat. SO how to do a research on that?

If I do something on anxiety, I would have to buy a module and run the program here.. one of the clin.psychs in my department says that its all bout the treatment program.. do something that you can own or contribute to the field. She translated the CBT module into Malay... so in other words, she's pushing me to translate an English module into Malay and run it in local population... adoi.. sounds susah.. somore want to do big group intervention... then again anxiety is pretty common in adolescents rite? but how come kids with anxiety are untraceable? Would i get enough data from clinics here in Klang Valley. I'm worried because anxiety isnt something that people frequently report. Its something hidden.. but obesity..u physically can see the problem... u just have to peel the layers off.

hmmm...i dunno wat to do...

there's also a possibility that my future supervisor would just change the whole topic altogether... sigh..

deep down.. i'm scared! that's just it..scared..scared of the unknown future..

it ain't all bout fun and games especially on a foreign land with a foreign supervisor.. but wat worries me also is the fact that I wont get enough money to run the research.. the only hope is if one of the clin psychs conduct a mega-research and i'm part of the team member.. only problem is I have to follow their interest of study... dem... which is practically chronic pain, depression and anxiety.. tak tahulu.. beserah pd Allah..

but what I know is I really really reaaaaalllly need to do write to the postgrad coordinator by the end of this week.. no later than that..

so HELP!!!! What should I do??

Something to think about....

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